Maybe I'm back in the AI game after watching girl's night. WARNING! If you choose to ignore me, just remember that I told you so-just in case some freaks keep her in the running. Next time Haeley Vaughn is slated to sing just mute the TV. It's similar (but opposite) to the Sirens effect on Odysseus. The dog howls, my head starts throbbing, neighbors knock on the door yelling to get out of the house . . . trust me it’s a mess; mute the TV as soon as you see her pick up the mic. Avoid the trauma.
Okay, 10 girls, let's make it 9 (you really can't count Haeley's noise as singing) girls competed and two will go home tonight. OMG if Haeley isn't one of them, my suspicions are correct – there are lots of stupid people out there. She should go home and make tons (literally) of her homemade headbands and take vocal lessons with the proceeds.
The night started with the best vocal performance to date during Season 9 from my picked-as-a-finalist-way-back-to-her-audition, Crystal Bowersox. She deserves an extra vote from the pity list, but she doesn’t even need it. When I heard CCR song I was already pumped; then I heard the song title and put my face about 11 inches from the TV and stared with my ears open. What I love, love, love about this chick is her independence and lack of butt kissing attitude. She can stand still at the microphone and capture attention with the story she’s telling through her voice. She doesn’t need all the extra fluff of choreography or playing to the camera. The bluesy-gospel spin in her version of Put a Candle in the Window must be embedded in my head. I find myself humming it and thinking about the performance. (Yes, I do sound a lot like her-my 3-year-old granddaughter just loves my voice). Bowersox is solid but she has more competition that I suspected.
I liked Lilly (albino hair) Scott before her performance but her rendition of Sam Cook’s song pulled me into that TV screen again. She was totally engrossed in the soul of the song, believing the lyrics that change is gonna come. I knew she was a keeper, but I didn’t know she was bonified, too! Another tip: bet on one of the girls who doesn’t fit the look of the traditional all-round American beauty. The best ones in the bunch are a little off-center as far as style is concerned-vocal and appearance and personality.
Okay, Siobhan Magnus is more than a little off center, but that girlish out-of-place collection of stuff she wore with those turn of the century shoes was kinda cute in a devious kinky way. I think she rag ties her hair and then forgets to take all the rags out. What? Oh, that’s on purpose. Okay. Yah I knew that; I just wondered if you did. Anyway, I’d given this girl back to her consignment shop designer but she stepped to department store rank for having the rocks to take on Aretha. She seems waaaay comfortable on stage, too. She didn’t hold back, wasn’t off key, belted it out when she needed to, hit an amazing note that the judges went ga-ga over (making them look desperate) but she actually appeared to have fun while she pushed the “advance to go” button. New dark horse. She was anything but forgettable!
The other contenda was my home girl Katelyn Epperly. The piano was a classy touch. The Coldplay song was on key and the notes rang full and true but somebody hit the wrong speed on playback. It was TOO slow. (The one time Ellen was on target and didn’t just endorse Randy’s opinion). Katelyn’s ride might go that extra mile because she IS that all American look girl. Just enough touch of style to be quirky in a normal way. But, those kinky curls look like Annie grew up and Miss Hannigan never brushed her hair.
The aforementioned females should move on. Period. I really don’t care if Michelle Delamour, Didi Benami, Katie Stevens, Lacey Brown or Paige Davis goes home. Just as long as the other loser joins Haeley it’s all good. Okay, I had my fingers crossed. Lacey is trying too hard and getting on my nerves and Didi’s last name sounds like a sandwich. Plus, the meowy thing? Really? I supposed that could be a blessing in disguise. When her attempt at a singing career crashes she could do cat food commercials. Michelle just wasted her voice again and was blah. She acts like she doesn’t have the energy to sing with passion so let her go home and take a nap. So pick one of the litter. Katie she knows how to say kiss me in six languages which should buy her another week. But, wait, did I say Lacey is getting annoying? Pick 2 or made it a 6 pack. Just make sure Haeley’s luggage gets on the bus. Please!
BTW Ryan has been kinda cute, but the other four regulars. YAWN. Gag (for Kara). YAWN.
So that’s the way it rolls tonight. If I am wrong I will look for the delete better and think of a good excuse.
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